Sometimes I would do something on purpose just to see the results. I remember having a fat magnum sharpie and streaker in my hand, and just destroying and vandalizing the High school bathrooms and panels with my Graffiti name (treo). Staff ended up knowing it was me, but I managed to slip away without any disciplinary actions used against me, luck was on my side. It was a daily thing too, did that for like 3 years before officially stoppin' it. The urge still runs deep by the way, and the thrill is unparalleled. Risking is pretty essential in life just so you can see how far you can go. You won't really know how strong you are until being strong is the only option you have. I get my self in situation I'll end up havin' to improvise from and see a proper solution or way out, it can turn out disappointing or good. Balancing working every night, having adventures and takin' summer school is one. Getting high, drunk, and whatnot, all that stuff we were taught to never do is another...I even tried Pokeball Yellowstar, a pill that's pure ecstasy with a very HIGH rating(9-10 / 10), (researched pill reports) just to see where it'll take me; I ended up crash landing on the moon, shit was INTENSE AF, lasted for a good 12+ hours. I had Body twitches, a warm brain, Palms were soaked wet, eye's were rollin' all the way back, and I was talkative AF, specially towards emotions. That shit gave me so much satisfaction, that much happiness in a matter of hours was crazy. After that, I got a pretty bad comedown, I felt all depressed and shit for a while, it was definately an experience.
Basically, I fuck with myself sometimes.
Of course, nothin' too hardcore. It's just seein' where one thing can take me, then movin' on from there; Takin' in things/tasks 'til you can't take no more.
