Recluse.

what is it. the magnet that pulls me out the physical world, pleading for something deeper. with a couple selected thoughts, i can make my own heart beat fast, remembering things like cooked food. sometimes, i take myself to a time that doesn't exist. can't seem to follow the mainstream, and the media just looks muddy to me. i stay reading w/ open eyes. i'm often inspired, but i want to influence. this inconsistent balance...seem to reach out to me. i want to absorb a personal vibe...disinfect the malcontent, i'm hearing things once or twice before, some nights I have nothing to do but medicate and create~